Well, I have to admit I have been censored about three times in my career here on HR Hero. My entire post completely wiped out as if it never existed. No verbal warnings, just immediate dismissal. But, those occurred pre-Exodus. Kind of like Old Testament vs today's New Testament.
Good to see you all have kept this thread productive while I was out all day at a spring training baseball game. Angels vs. Athletics. I have no idea who won but we had a good time.
We took our Assistant Preschool Directors on an all-day retreat: started the day with a game of kickball (my team won) then on to the baseball game. We have an hour to spare so we set them free to go shopping or whatever they want, then we will meet for dinner and drinks.
I'm using my time to check in on you people - I know you missed me.
Paul, I am the type of bada$$ who can be bada$$ yet friendly, hence the smileys.
I am too busy to respond. I am currently engaged in creating my own religion based around a formerly popular pop diva. It will have its own judicial code that I am going to demand that I be able to live under.
"Pariah" means "reject!", yells Paul across a series of cramped cubicles. "I looked it UP!"
ACU Frank rips a set of headphones off his head and pauses the casette recording of "Introduction to Human Resources" on his desk. "So?" Frank growls, slowly standing to glare back at Paul over the cubicles. "You got a problem with that?"
Paul leaps over a small partitioned wall and lands like a cat on top of the copy machine. Frank spins and grabs a large stapler on his desk. With the confidence of an old high school quarterback, Frank launches a perfect spiral directly aimed at Paul left knee.
To avoid the airborne stapler, Paul executes a perfect three point flip from the copy machine, accidentally causing the copy machine to make 20 blank copies, double sided. The stapler misses Paul by inches and takes out Stan from accounting who had unfortunately prarie-dogged from his cubicle at that exact moment to see what the ruckus was all about.
"Smooth move, Ex Lax!" sneers Paul, unintentionally pulling out an insult from his middle school years, "NOW who's going to process our invoices!"
"You've HAD THIS COMING FOR YEARS", snarls Frank, "what with your stupid threads that won't die and conservative rants! Its time someone took you to the woodshed! I'm going OLD TESTAMENT on you! You're going to qualify for FMLA and ADA when I'm done with you!"
TIME OUT! We need time to evaluate both combatants and set the betting lines before the next chapter/encounter. ACLU (oops, I mean ACU) Frank displays a strong arm but likely has no mobility and as a former qb, doesn't like anyone touching him (no contact). Paul is exceptionally agile (light on his feet?) and has keen peripheral vision. Likely a defensive back in HS. Neither displays great mental capacity but hold strong to their convictions. Frank's propensity to weapoons violence when confronted could be his achilles. Paul's mental process, slowed by possible steroid use post puberty, will likely allow Frank first significant shot. But if he is able to recover, Paul could use his lightning quickness to put Frank into a threatening pose at the shredder. Cheerleaders also need to be arranged and can choose their own side to support. Color is not allowed in this selection process. Opening line: Paul by 1 in the 4th round.
I am not claiming to know HRQ well, but I think I can claim with complete confidence that she was never a cheerleader.
...at his knee!
....at his other knee! ????
HRQ: cheers are supposed to have rythm. Hmmm. Sounds like you need Ray. I would volunteer to help you, but I abhor violence. (sniff) Besides, I like Paul, even when he has gone off the deep end about his beliefs.
Nae
ps: what is really sad is how easy it is me to sound stiff and stuffy on this forum...oh wait...I sound that way ALL the time.
Apparently you have never heard of this age-old cheer. I don't remember WHERE it came from, but it's a famous one, might have been from the Smothers Brothers. The rah rah ree, rah rah rass part anyway. x;-) Throwing the stapler, however, is a maneuver unique to the Forum.
Paul still needs a sidekick. Sounds like you'd be a great fit for him. He gets all high and mighty now and then. x:D
Frank lowers his head and charges at Paul who has unexplicably returned to posting on HR HERO. Momentarily distracted, Paul is oblivious to Frank's attack until its too late. Frank's shoulder blades connect with Paul's ribs and both men tumble to the floor.
Being interrupted mid-post sends Paul into a seething rage. Placing two feet on Franks ample midsection, he launches Frank over the flimsy cubicle walls and into the employee breakroom.
"Must.. finish.. post!" cries Paul, wincing in pain from two cracked ribs. Pulling himself up to his Swedish ergonomic chair he punches out a few last words and presses "submit".
To the horrified gasps of fellow co-workers, ACU Frank has landed square on top of the six foot lunchroom table. Frank rolls painfully off the table and shakes the stars out of his head. Unable to form anything more than a monosyllabic grunt, Frank spins and begins feeding coins into the vending machine.
Back at the computer, Paul is chuckling to himself at one of his own posts when two twinkies, a pop tart, and a bottle of apple juice catch him square on the side of his jaw. "HA!! GHaggleSHRRRGGG!!!" screams Frank, eyes wide and wild with psychotic abandon.
Frank begins to twirl like a dervish, ripping his tie off his neck and holding his arms high in a show of primeval triumph.
A couple of interns approach Paul's motionless body and poke it with a ruler. Nothing. No movement. No response.
The office grows quiet except for Frank's Tasmanian grunts and howls. Suddenly, the silence is broken by a woman's scream.
Okay, round one was awesome, so my betting line remains the same: Paul by 1 in the 4th. BTW Paul, why isn't this on Son of...? Take this over there and bring the Shariah thread here. More fitting for the theme. MissK is making it much toooo serious.
As far as I'm concerned it's just friendly debate (well except for Ray accusing me of being astoundingly ignorant - that would earn him a sock in the gut if he were saying that to me in person. And let me tell you, I have a mean right hook [and I'm not afraid to use it]).
Also, I wasn't the one who made it so serious! I tried to make fun of law & order stealing our material and Ray just couldn't resist quashing my attempt at a lighthearted comment. I see how it is for the newbies around here...
Disclaimer: This post is designed for non-serious purposes only. The content of this post should not be construed to be "too serious," nor do any communications in this forum create an atmosphere of seriousness. Individuals reading this forum are encouraged to realize that disagreement does not necessitate or imply animosity, and that it is difficult to ascertain a person's tone solely from his or her written word, especially in a forum where the use of emoticons are discouraged.
I agree with you Missk. The problem is these forums lack "inflection" and its easy to misunderstand eachother. Ray, like me, has developed a knee jerk reaction to people who lump Christians into the same boat as Osama Bin Laden, the KKK, and folks who take 17 items into the express lane at the supermarket.
I call it "CNNitis".
Well, Frank is running around "pants-free" so I probably should get back to the story...
[font size="1" color="#FF0000"]LAST EDITED ON 04-05-07 AT 01:21PM (CST)[/font][br][br]I'm sorry, Missk. I like to joke around here as much or more than anyone else. The number of posts credited to me is due to that, not my erudition. But, there are some topics I am very passionate about and take very seriously.
Oh, and you gave up your newbie status once you surpassed 50 posts. :-)
[font size="1" color="#FF0000"]LAST EDITED ON 04-05-07 AT 11:49AM (CST)[/font][br][br]No, it's in Paul's. I was being ironical. I expected you to already know that I am a spelling and grammar snob and credit me duly.
Ray, your erudition isn't the only thing getting deep around here. Paul, can you pass the twinkies over if your not going to use them in this continuing saga, I'm running out of popcorn.
OMG!!! I just realized why last night around 9pm I suddenly had to have some popcorn, something I rarely eat except on the occassional weekend. I had to have the real thing too, not the microwave kind. This thread must be getting to me!
Comments
We took our Assistant Preschool Directors on an all-day retreat: started the day with a game of kickball (my team won) then on to the baseball game. We have an hour to spare so we set them free to go shopping or whatever they want, then we will meet for dinner and drinks.
I'm using my time to check in on you people - I know you missed me.
Paul, I am the type of bada$$ who can be bada$$ yet friendly, hence the smileys.
I'm off to dinner and drinks. Carry on.
are preserving the puppies
and rainbows on this thread!
It will be called Mariah Law.
When you wish upon a star....
makes no difference where you are.....
(only cricket I could think of)
ACU Frank rips a set of headphones off his head and pauses the casette recording of "Introduction to Human Resources" on his desk. "So?" Frank growls, slowly standing to glare back at Paul over the cubicles. "You got a problem with that?"
Paul leaps over a small partitioned wall and lands like a cat on top of the copy machine. Frank spins and grabs a large stapler on his desk. With the confidence of an old high school quarterback, Frank launches a perfect spiral directly aimed at Paul left knee.
To avoid the airborne stapler, Paul executes a perfect three point flip from the copy machine, accidentally causing the copy machine to make 20 blank copies, double sided. The stapler misses Paul by inches and takes out Stan from accounting who had unfortunately prarie-dogged from his cubicle at that exact moment to see what the ruckus was all about.
"Smooth move, Ex Lax!" sneers Paul, unintentionally pulling out an insult from his middle school years, "NOW who's going to process our invoices!"
"You've HAD THIS COMING FOR YEARS", snarls Frank, "what with your stupid threads that won't die and conservative rants! Its time someone took you to the woodshed! I'm going OLD TESTAMENT on you! You're going to qualify for FMLA and ADA when I'm done with you!"
to be continued...
Cheerleaders also need to be arranged and can choose their own side to support. Color is not allowed in this selection process.
Opening line: Paul by 1 in the 4th round.
Rah, rah, rass! Throw a stapler at his other knee!
Go TEAM!
...at his knee!
....at his other knee! ????
HRQ: cheers are supposed to have rythm. Hmmm. Sounds like you need Ray. I would volunteer to help you, but I abhor violence. (sniff) Besides, I like Paul, even when he has gone off the deep end about his beliefs.
Nae
ps: what is really sad is how easy it is me to sound stiff and stuffy on this forum...oh wait...I sound that way ALL the time.
Paul still needs a sidekick. Sounds like you'd be a great fit for him. He gets all high and mighty now and then. x:D
Being interrupted mid-post sends Paul into a seething rage. Placing two feet on Franks ample midsection, he launches Frank over the flimsy cubicle walls and into the employee breakroom.
"Must.. finish.. post!" cries Paul, wincing in pain from two cracked ribs. Pulling himself up to his Swedish ergonomic chair he punches out a few last words and presses "submit".
To the horrified gasps of fellow co-workers, ACU Frank has landed square on top of the six foot lunchroom table. Frank rolls painfully off the table and shakes the stars out of his head. Unable to form anything more than a monosyllabic grunt, Frank spins and begins feeding coins into the vending machine.
Back at the computer, Paul is chuckling to himself at one of his own posts when two twinkies, a pop tart, and a bottle of apple juice catch him square on the side of his jaw. "HA!! GHaggleSHRRRGGG!!!" screams Frank, eyes wide and wild with psychotic abandon.
Frank begins to twirl like a dervish, ripping his tie off his neck and holding his arms high in a show of primeval triumph.
A couple of interns approach Paul's motionless body and poke it with a ruler. Nothing. No movement. No response.
The office grows quiet except for Frank's Tasmanian grunts and howls. Suddenly, the silence is broken by a woman's scream.
"Frank's taking off his pants!!!!"
to be continued...
BTW Paul, why isn't this on Son of...? Take this over there and bring the Shariah thread here. More fitting for the theme. MissK is making it much toooo serious.
Also, I wasn't the one who made it so serious! I tried to make fun of law & order stealing our material and Ray just couldn't resist quashing my attempt at a lighthearted comment. I see how it is for the newbies around here...
Disclaimer: This post is designed for non-serious purposes only. The content of this post should not be construed to be "too serious," nor do any communications in this forum create an atmosphere of seriousness. Individuals reading this forum are encouraged to realize that disagreement does not necessitate or imply animosity, and that it is difficult to ascertain a person's tone solely from his or her written word, especially in a forum where the use of emoticons are discouraged.
I call it "CNNitis".
Well, Frank is running around "pants-free" so I probably should get back to the story...
Oh, and you gave up your newbie status once you surpassed 50 posts. :-)
Irregardless, HRQ continued on with her cheers;
Rah rah reck, hit 'em in the neck!
Rah rah relbow, hit 'em in the elbow!
Rah rah, er, ruler, poke Paul with a ruler!
Rah rah rants, Frank, PUT ON YOUR PANTS!
And there are two r's in irregardless.
thing getting deep around here.
Paul, can you pass the twinkies
over if your not going to use them
in this continuing saga, I'm
running out of popcorn.
can you smell it? Real butter and
other flavors will be available
as you mind allows.
Quick Paul! Finish your story...with pants on.
I need to make sure you get your Mountain Dew every day, now that I see what withdrawal does to your brain cells.