Reminded me of a moment I choose to forget. At a soccer tournament, we parents decided to take the girls to a movie. I left for a few minutes to go the ladies room. When I returned, I sat down without noticing that my daughter had put a whoopee cushion on my seat. Didn't know whether to be embarassed, kill or laugh.
Well, I don't have children but I did teach preschool for five years and that is an age when children begin to discover their body parts so some of the stuff they say and do is pretty hilarious. I hope none of the language offends...
I had one little girl who looked at my teacher assistant and very matter of factly asked "Do you have t*ts? I have t*ts" My teacher asst replied that no, she has breasts.
Talking about differences and hair color...one child wanted to know why the hair on mommy's head was yellow and the hair on her private was black.
We were discussing strangers, what to do if they ever got lost, etc and I was trying to get an idea of how many children knew their parents' names. I asked one boy, he said "Mami". So I asked "OK, what does Papi call her?" and he said "Oh, Puta! (spanish for wh*re). Si, my Papi he say 'you puta' to my Mami" I hope she never has to be paged in the mall...
My 3 1/2 year old son has a bad habit of complaining that "my peepee is big". This started about a year ago and, at first, was just happening at home. We try do downplay it and go on. But, about a month ago, he finally said it in public - in the middle of a Target store, when there were people on each side of us in the aisle. And yes, they all heard it and laughed. I was VERY embarrassed.
Once my 6 year old son and my 9 year old went along with my now ex-husband to a furniture store to purchase a couch. For some reason out of the blue, my son walked up to his Dad, while he was discussing the purchase with the salesperson, hit him on the leg to get his attention. His dad looked down and Matt asked, "Daddy, what is a condom?" My husband never blinked. He said, "It's some place you retire to in Florida, go back over there to your mom." He went back to his conversation with the salesperson. All went well until we got outside and Matt and his dad had a lengthy discussion. He never asked that question again. He is now 18 and we still laugh about that day, even he laughs about it.
As a mother of a 3 1/2 year old boy, I subscribe to Parents magazine so that I know I'm not alone out there. They have a page in every issue that is my favorite. It is just like this thread - most embarassing moments. It is wonderful. When the magazine comes in the mail, I flip straight to that page. I've been the same way with this thread. It is wonderful! Thank you for starting it!
I don't have any children, but absolutely rolled on the floor when one of my friends told me about this one. Her little boy went up to his grandfather (her father) and handed him a penny and asked him to "make it scream." Everyone was puzzled until the her son explained, "Daddy says you know how to pinch a penny hard enough to make it scream. Will you make it scream for me, Grandpa?"
Okay, I was pretty pleased that I didn't have a lot to add to this thread, but lo and behold - my eight year old spoke.
Yesterday, he told his Sunday School teacher, with whom he is not on the best of terms, that he thought she had a moustache. He later apologized when he found out that women don't like this pointed out to there.
I checked her out - she does have a moustache - but not a Van Dyke or goatee.
It appears that you are the "renamer" of our esteemed members. Is there criteria for the renaming or is it spur of the moment? (Like when Don or Ray say chauvinist things?)
I like to think that it is because I'm a bass trombonist that it means I like to "Toot my own horn". Bass trombonists are known for being bold and brassy. We aren't like wimpy viola players.
Parabeagle became Beagle because I knew everyone on the Forum would know who that was. Then in a post, I called him Beag. It seems he took offense at that and asked if the next name I would give him would be B. In my reply, I told him no, that it would be Beaglepuss. Maybe now it should become Beaglepuss1?
Ray is Raytoot because, as a musician, he plays (toots) a brass wind instrument. Whether he is good or not is another question.
Usually the nicknames are a spur of the moment thing, depending on the last post of the victim. x}>
>I posted this to the end of another thread, and then thought it could >be a great topic in and of itself. Whether you were the embarrassor >or the embarrassee, let's hear it! > >It was January of 1996. The casino I still work at was involved with >the Fiesta Bowl. At the time I was in Marketing, and I was invited to >a governor's ball. Being single, I asked my 19-year old son who was >home on Christmas break to attend with me. > >So we're standing in line with all the dressed up ladies and gents, >waiting to enter. My son looks at me and states quite eloquently (and >loudly), "So ma'am, how long have you been using the escort service?" > >He turned 27 yesterday and is lucky to have lived that long.
I thought I would die laughing. Great kid! My son got us once, but much more innocently. Little sister was born when brother was 2.5 yrs. We had to explain the obvious differences in plumbing to him. As we entered Church on Sunday morning, an elderly woman approached to tell him hello and look at the baby. My son said, "My name is Patrick. I am a boy. I have a weenie." I thought I was going to have to call the paramedics to revive that woman. -- and little sister, now 2.5, she tells people, "My name is Cara. I am a girl. Girls don't need weenies because we are special."
I walked in on my 4yr old with his pants down. He was holding his erect "member" to the fan. Alarmed that he was going to put it in one of the vents, I got hysterical and yelled "whatcha doin'? you gonna get hurt...get away from the fan!" He looked at me and nonchanlantly said "it was hot and I was just cooling it." Little boys, you gotta love 'em.
Comments
I had one little girl who looked at my teacher assistant and very matter of factly asked "Do you have t*ts? I have t*ts" My teacher asst replied that no, she has breasts.
Talking about differences and hair color...one child wanted to know why the hair on mommy's head was yellow and the hair on her private was black.
We were discussing strangers, what to do if they ever got lost, etc and I was trying to get an idea of how many children knew their parents' names. I asked one boy, he said "Mami". So I asked "OK, what does Papi call her?" and he said "Oh, Puta! (spanish for wh*re). Si, my Papi he say 'you puta' to my Mami" I hope she never has to be paged in the mall...
Margaret Morford
theHRedge
615-371-8200
[email]mmorford@mleesmith.com[/email]
[url]http://www.thehredge.net[/url]
Yesterday, he told his Sunday School teacher, with whom he is not on the best of terms, that he thought she had a moustache. He later apologized when he found out that women don't like this pointed out to there.
I checked her out - she does have a moustache - but not a Van Dyke or goatee.
Zanne
Uh oh, am I in trouble again?
It appears that you are the "renamer" of our esteemed members. Is there criteria for the renaming or is it spur of the moment? (Like when Don or Ray say chauvinist things?)
By the way - what is a "raytoot"?
Zanne
How close am I Ritaanz?
Ray is Raytoot because, as a musician, he plays (toots) a brass wind instrument. Whether he is good or not is another question.
Usually the nicknames are a spur of the moment thing, depending on the last post of the victim. x}>
Ritaanz, if I were a "good" musician, would I be here posting on an HR forum?
BTW, anyone else notice Don hasn't posted much in this conference?
I'm sure she meant in the nicest of ways.
Anyway, you seem much nicer than some of the Forum Mafia.
(I won't name names!!!)
Zanne
I guess I'm just a Mafia wannabe without wit or sharp tongue. x:-(
Zanne
>be a great topic in and of itself. Whether you were the embarrassor
>or the embarrassee, let's hear it!
>
>It was January of 1996. The casino I still work at was involved with
>the Fiesta Bowl. At the time I was in Marketing, and I was invited to
>a governor's ball. Being single, I asked my 19-year old son who was
>home on Christmas break to attend with me.
>
>So we're standing in line with all the dressed up ladies and gents,
>waiting to enter. My son looks at me and states quite eloquently (and
>loudly), "So ma'am, how long have you been using the escort service?"
>
>He turned 27 yesterday and is lucky to have lived that long.
I thought I would die laughing. Great kid! My son got us once, but much more innocently. Little sister was born when brother was 2.5 yrs. We had to explain the obvious differences in plumbing to him. As we entered Church on Sunday morning, an elderly woman approached to tell him hello and look at the baby. My son said, "My name is Patrick. I am a boy. I have a weenie." I thought I was going to have to call the paramedics to revive that woman. -- and little sister, now 2.5, she tells people, "My name is Cara. I am a girl. Girls don't need weenies because we are special."