UBS dress code

Have you guys heard about the over 40 pages of dress code put out by Swiss bank UBS last month? I heard it got ridiculed so much they decided to redo it. Here are some of the hi-lights:


"A flawless appearance can bring inner peace and a sense of security. Adopting impeccable behavior extends to impeccable presentation. The garment is a critical form of non-verbal communication."


"Jacket buttons should be closed. When seated, they must always be open. Only when it is very hot, and after confirmation of your supervisor, can you wear the shirt without a jacket. While blazers are equipped with pockets, they were not designed to contain a large number of personal effects or accessories. Leave these empty, so they do not deform. The jacket should be closed when you stand or you're traveling. The shoulders should have natural proportions: if the shoulders are too broad you will appear too big with a too-small head. Conversely, too narrow shoulders could make your head look excessively large. The jacket must completely cover your posterior."


"Eyewear can only be in a subdued color range. Ultra-trendy eyewear or too showy colored glasses are not tolerated. Ultra-hip glasses or lenses in too gaudy colors are not allowed. Make sure that your jewelry be matched to the metallic color of your glasses' frames. Sunglasses cannot be worn on top of the head."


"A scent should at first be perceptible at a distance - an arm's length - but should be discreet. If you like wearing perfume or after-shave, remember, the scent of a perfume is more pleasant than being invaded by a fragrant cloud. Try a new fragrance during your lunch break. The ideal time to apply perfume is directly after you take a hot shower, when your pores are still open. In addition, your skin should not be dry. Therefore, you should always first apply body lotion to your skin. It is important that this lotion is fragrance free or smells neutral, because even if it's pleasant, when mixed with the perfume it could clash and be too harsh."


"Stop wearing bracelets and earrings. Piercings, besides earrings, and tattoos are prohibited. Tattoos, piercings or anklets are outdated and do not look professional. You can wear a watch to the extent it does not threaten not safety. Out of consideration for our foreign customers, avoid conspicuous religious symbols."


"An appropriate remedy to prolong the life of shoes is to replace heels early. Always put on your shoes with the help of a shoehorn. Completely unlace your shoes after use. After having worn a pair of shoes, allow your shoes at least one day, so let the leather dry out and rest."


"Every little hair that grows on the body has a function. The eyebrows protect the eyes from perspiration and eyelashes protect dust and small insects. Nose hair traps dust and foreign matter..."

"Our body odor can not be changed. However, we can ensure that it produces only pleasant scents. Strong breath (garlic, onions, cigarettes) can have a significant impact on communication. It is nevertheless possible to fight bad breath - during the week avoid dishes made with garlic and onions."

"Factors that lead to the pollution of the skin are many. Since our skin is basically our 'first" garment, it requires care too. We recommend protecting skin by applying a skin cream that consists of nourishing and soothing elements. Thus, your skin will appear beautiful and you will be radiant!"
(I understand this was in the men's section.)

"If you wear a watch, it suggests reliability and that punctuality is of great concern to you."

"Each time you remove your suit, untie your tie and hang or wrap it. Give your tie at least one rest day before reuse. The tip of your tie should under no circumstances enter your pants."

Underwear is among the most intimate parts of our clothing. Your underwear must not be visible through your clothes, or stand out. Your figure should not suffer from the way you wear your underwear."

"Do not wash, nor ever iron your shirts yourself."


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