Smelly and Psycho

Today's just one of those days, so I've got to share. Oh, by the way, I'm relatively new to the forum, so if I ever post anything out of line, just let me know. And this could be long, but it is entertaining.

Apparently, I've been having some staffing issues lately. I'd like to introduce you to Smelly and Psycho. Smelly was (until just recently) my receptionist. She had gastric bypass surgery about a year ago and lost alot of weight. She was a very pleasant and nice woman, however, one of the side effects of the surgery can be a FOUL, FOUL flatulence issue. I work early hours and she just works the afternoon, so we only cross paths for a couple of hours a day. And just for reference, the entire office is upstairs and we are the only two downstairs. Anyhow, people started complaining to me about the "smell" after I left. Apparently, she was waiting until I would leave and then just "let go", figuring nobody was there to notice. I didn't know how to approach the issue...I mean how could they prove it was her after all? .........Until, one day when I stayed late. I'VE NEVER SMELLED ANYTHING LIKE IT IN MY LIFE. None of the office could come downstairs, where the restrooms are, because it was lingering, for HOURS! A client walked into our showroom and left gagging. And this was happening every single day. The day I experienced it, I left my office and attempted to return for the next 2 hours, but everytime I tried, I would start gagging. How would you all have handled the situation? Um, excuse me, but your butt smells so you have to go?

Okay, so now meet Psycho. Psycho was the morning receptionist and Smelly was the afternoon receptionist. Anybody watch Dr. Phil out there? Seen the "Relationship Rescue Retreat" series? I think it's still in progress. Well, if you do, check out Nora and Paul. Nora apparently cheated on her husband and now they beat each other up. They are quickly becomming the stars of the series. Nora was my morning receptionist and just stopped showing one day....I think to film the Dr. Phil show.

So what do you think this says about me since I hired them? 2 for 2? Maybe I should quit while I'm ahead. They will probably forever be the most notorious receptionists we've had! Anybody got some better ones out there?

Comments

  • 12 Comments sorted by Votes Date Added
  • Nora....really?? or are you kidding???
  • Smelly became that way after you hired her but what about Psycho? I don't watch Dr. Phil so can't read her/his problem from what you wrote.

    If I were Smelly's boss, however, and there wasn't a female HR rep here to do it for me, maybe I would ask her permission to address a personal matter about her personal hygiene. If she says "OK"...I would ask her again if she's sure it would be o.k.

    I would then bring up the odor that I had personnally experienced and ask if there is anything that she can do about it.

    my .02 worth...

    Don or Ray, I'm sure you'll let me know if Melissa would be in danger of a lawsuit if she did what I described. But be kind... :o)
  • Our last receptionist was a mess. Her oddest trait was that she hit people whenever she heard or said something funny. She'd kind of scream out loud and laugh at the same time, and give the closest person a shove! Her husband told me that once he sat on the couch between her and her sister, and he was getting screams, slaps and shoves from both sides! At lunch once she almost knocked a guy off his chair!
    We had a smelly guy, too, round as a beach ball and very nice, but his smell lingered in our office for hours after he left. I can honestly say that I had no hand in hiring either of them!
  • Yep-Nora is the one and no, I'm not kidding. I don't watch Dr. Phil, but I've been kind of keeping tabs on it and caught it this Tuesday when AI was at commercial.

    As for Smelly, I just thought it might bring up some interesting ideas. Fortunetly, I didn't have to bring it up with her. She'd been here three months and couldn't put a call through to save her life. I'd actually already decided to let her go for performance issues before all this came to my attention (nobody wanted to say anything) and I had the "experience" the same day I was letting her go. But I always wonder how I would have approached the issue....anyhow, how did you get my name? Is there some way to find out peoples names I don't know about b/c I thought only your screen name posted?
  • If you click on that little head icon between the flying document and the tiny computer, it shows the person's name, if the person has made their profile public.

    You can change your profile preferences by clicking on the "user" icon in the forum lobby.

    Brad Forrister
    Director of Publishing
    M. Lee Smith Publishers


  • A friend of mine had gastric bypass and although she has not shared stinky farts, she does share the most disgusting gastric noises I ever did hear. Now, yes, we all burp. But her burps sound like they are coming straight from the depths of hell as they echo up her esophogus and reverberate in her gullet and out her mouth. I can not eat in the same room as her and there's not much that grosses me out while eating.
  • I wouldn't touch this one with a 10' blow torch.

    The only legal concern would be asking her about medical problems that could open an ADA can of worms. Sounds like termination for performance issues is your best bet. There have been several discussions on this topic and I personally have had to address the issue with both male and female ee's. Be direct and to the point and very matter of fact.
  • Melissa: (I also know you're 5'5" with dark brown hair). I'm trying to understand why you posted the situation if it was already resolved. I love fart jokes and can cut one with the best of them and have named more than a few of them on weekend rides; but, I can't get into making lots of jokes about people who have medical conditions with results they really have no control over. This is just my personal opinion and I'm by no means wanting to piss you off (although I might) but I find your inquiry disingenuous and by that I mean I don't really think you wanted a way to deal with the issues as much as you wanted to role out a comedic post of the situation. Correct me if I am wrong. Good luck staffing these positions to your satisfaction. x:-)
  • Jeeze! I've known people who have had this surgery and I've never heard of such stuff going on. Maybe this is a case of surgery gone bad!

    I believe I'd rather stay obese than put up with what you guys have described!
  • One of my support staff recently had a gastric bypass, she's been back to work for about 2 months now, but she doesn't exhibit any of those problems described. She does have to leave 1/2 hour early every two weeks to get a vitamin shot and she is on antibiotics nearly all the time.

    Maybe I'm just lucky those are her only apparent problems.

    Annie

  • Don-
    I found the profiles page after I posted yesterday, so that's clear. But now you're just giving me the creeps. I know you have a receding hairline and ride a motorcycle, but why I know that is obvious. As for you not understanding why I posted if the situation was already resolved, I can't help you there. I figured that by posting under the HR-de-har-har section and saying she was a former employee, it was pretty self explanatory. Had I posted under something like Employment Law with a topic as such, THAT would have been disingenuous.

    What I was trying to do...bring up comedic situations where people have had to approach issues that were difficult or embarrassing for both parties-not to make fun of those with medical conditions they cannot control.

    Thanks for the welcome to the forum by the way. xhugs
  • And comedic it was- I can just imagine your client's horror when he was in the smelly showroom!
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