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Funny hiring stories

awilliamsawilliams 258 Posts
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I'm looking for some funny stories about your hiring process - specifically funny things people have said or done during an interview, or goofy things they have written in their applications and resumes.

If you have any to share, please post them here.

Anne Williams
Attorney Editor
M. Lee Smith Publishers, LLC
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  • 23 Comments sorted by Votes Date Added
  • LarryCLarryC 1,267 Posts
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    The one I will always remember was several years ago. I had a guy in for a first interview and I started off by asking him how had he heard about our company. He replied, "I had sex with one of your employees." I then asked him, "Here or elsewhere?" He said, "Elsewhere." I then said, "Thank you for interviewing. Good luck elsewhere."
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  • LivindonSouthLivindonSouth 1,358 Posts
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    The guy last year who insisted on constantly positioning his Masonic ring so I could see it, and asked if I were a brother. Had he ever been convicted of a criminal offense before? "Not really", he said, "Since his bomb threat to his last company was non-adjudicated and remanded to the file". I probed, as a good interviewer will. He allowed as how "Employers should not piss their employees off." Before I got this guy out of my office, he reassured me that his counselor told him he probably never would repeat that behavior again anyway. That really didn't tilt the scales though.




    Disclaimer: This message is not intended to offend or attack. It is posted as personal opinion. If you find yourself offended or uncomfortable, email me and let me know why.
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  • TN HRTN HR 1,170 Posts
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    [font size="1" color="#FF0000"]LAST EDITED ON 07-26-05 AT 03:46PM (CST)[/font][br][br]The guy with the Masonic ring was a certain fake. He would have never needed to ask the question. It would have been obvious to him the second you met.
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  • LivindonSouthLivindonSouth 1,358 Posts
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    I don't shake hands with applicants.




    Disclaimer: This message is not intended to offend or attack. It is posted as personal opinion. If you find yourself offended or uncomfortable, email me and let me know why.
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  • ritaanzritaanz 2,665 Posts
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    Let's see. The gal that pulled a sandwich from her bag half way through the interview. She said she had another interview after this one and did not have time to eat.

    Or, how about the girl that was polishing her toe nails in the lobby while she was waiting for her interview?

    Then there was the guy who was just released from prison. Why was he there? Because he and his wife got divorced and that broke his heart. To get even with her, he took up drugs.

    I must not forget the young lady that put her totebag on the floor by her chair. As we talked, the bag fell over and the ceramic bowl we had in the lobby fell out. THat bowl had to weigh ten pounds.



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  • TN HRTN HR 1,170 Posts
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    Whew! For a minute Rita, I thought you might say that another type of ceramic bowl fell out of her knapsack.
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  • szemcumoszemcumo 205 Posts
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    What was her reaction to the bowl falling out and what did you say to her? Surely you didn't let her leave with the bowl?
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  • ritaanzritaanz 2,665 Posts
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    Dam if she didn't tuck it back in and set the bag up straight again! Didn't say a word.

    I asked her to excuse me a sec and I picked up the phone, called our securuity guard and asked him to come to my office. She had no idea who I called. When the guard arrived, I thanked her for her time, told the guard she had stolen company property in her bag and to call the police.

    Wow, the look on her face was priceless.

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  • szemcumoszemcumo 205 Posts
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    That is great!!!! Good for you.
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  • dchr9203dchr9203 431 Posts
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    Lots over the years! Most recently was an interview for a Program Management position. Applicant arrived; very professional and well spoken. About 3 minutes into the interview, her cell phone rang, she put her finger up to interrupt me, no explanation (i.e. I'm sorry, my mother is on her death bed and I should check/take this call just in case), proceeded to answer it then entered into an argument with one of her kids about having pizza or not for lunch (knew it had to be one of the kids because the applicant said "because I am your mother and I said so!"). I got up, and without explanation left the interview room, and asked the receptionist to see her out when she completed her call. She didn't get the job.
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  • WhirlwindWhirlwind 882 Posts
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    A bazillion years ago, back when it was still okay to ask on the application, "Do you have any medical problems that would limit your ability to perform the job for which you are applying?", someone wrote, "I have grandma seizures." (Of course, we assumed she meant grand mal seizures.)

    On another occasion, a young lady had evidently learned that some of our more severely disabled students still wore diapers though school-aged. At the top of the app., she wrote in bold print, "I can handle sh*t, literally!!"








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  • SystemSystem 5,885 Posts
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    [font size="1" color="#FF0000"]LAST EDITED ON 07-27-05 AT 09:06AM (CST)[/font][br][br]How about an applicant with a 'Z' shaved in his hair on the side of his head - whatever that meant. He was wearing a black t-shirt that said "It must suck to be you." Maybe he thought I could appreciate his sense of non-violent rebellion and humor.

    Or the 24-year-old whose mother brings him to the interview because he can't get his drivers' license back until he pays all his DWI fines. Well, you can't blame a guy for trying to get back on his feet, get a job, and get his license back. But I kind of didn't like his mother sitting in on the interview answering for him.
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  • LivindonSouthLivindonSouth 1,358 Posts
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    The guy with the 'Z'; is he the new building inspector? And I can't help but notice the irony of your mentioning the DWI and using the word 'BUD'. Too early for that!




    Disclaimer: This message is not intended to offend or attack. It is posted as personal opinion. If you find yourself offended or uncomfortable, email me and let me know why.
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  • SystemSystem 5,885 Posts
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    I fixed it. Better now? ;;)
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  • szemcumoszemcumo 205 Posts
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    The guy that asked me if he would have to turn his head alot to run a press because he has been watching alot of TV since not working and his neck hurts all the time because his TV is on the wall to the right of his chair so he has to turn his neck to watch it all day so that would be a problem for him to have to move his head alot! Very short interview!
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  • szemcumoszemcumo 205 Posts
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    Oh forgot...I have an even better one than the guy with the neck problem... I was working in the school system when we were interviewing for an elementary school secretary. Female comes in wearing a t-shirt with cigs rolls up in the sleeve,flip flops and dirty cut off shorts. As I am speaking to her...we are in an elementary school mind you...I notice she has F--- the world tatooed on her knuckles. She tells me she has applied 4 other times and can't understand why she doesn't get hired! Didn't know where to start on that one.
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  • marcmarc 3,126 Posts
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    I was interviewing candidates for a big company controller position. All CPA types, three piece suits and high shine shoes for all ---except one. This guy comes in with a wrinkled suit and a somewhat soiled white shirt with frayed cuffs.

    His resume looked decent, but the man in front of me was hardly impressive.

    He began the interview by saying - I hope you don't mind if we relax and just chat through this interview. He then slid back in the chair and hoisted both feed up on the edge of the desk. To top of the slovenly look, one of his shoes had a spot worn all the way through and I could see his foot. I then noticed he wasn't wearing socks.

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  • LivindonSouthLivindonSouth 1,358 Posts
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    Marc, autobiographical comments are not accepted. I'm going to Snopes to see if that guy was really you!




    Disclaimer: This message is not intended to offend or attack. It is posted as personal opinion. If you find yourself offended or uncomfortable, email me and let me know why.
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  • marcmarc 3,126 Posts
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    In my case, I got the job and the shoes were not worn all the way through - I was not wearing socks though.
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  • safetysafety 768 Posts
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    Sounds like it's a good thing he didn't have a hole in his pants.
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  • awilliamsawilliams 258 Posts
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    Thank you for all your great stories. My personal favorite is the lady who attempted to steal the bowl from the lobby!

    Anne Williams
    Attorney Editor
    M. Lee Smith Publishers, LLC
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  • LivindonSouthLivindonSouth 1,358 Posts
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    You misunderstood, Ann. She picked it up so the toddler in the lobby would not break it. She intended all along to put it back in place when she left.




    Disclaimer: This message is not intended to offend or attack. It is posted as personal opinion. If you find yourself offended or uncomfortable, email me and let me know why.
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  • NatNat 207 Posts
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    I think I have shared this one before but I had a high school applicant put a letter of recommendation from a teacher in his application. Obviously he didn't read it because it said something like this:

    Please hire Joe (not his real name). His behavior is positive - positively horrible. Please take him before I lose my mind and my job.

    Unfortunately for this teacher, Joe didn't get the job.

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