Another crazy bathroom question, what would you do?
Java HR
31 Posts
I am not sure where these people come from... but we have an employee who unzips on the way to the bathroom. We have (of course) documented and disciplined.
However, he has a past history of co-worker issues. He has a complaint in his file on unwanted advancements toward his co-worker (female) that has been resolved and closed.
Has anyone ever had to deal with an "unzipper"? Is this behavior normal on any planet?
Disclaimer: I in no way mean to offend anyone with this question. I in no way want any glory or chaos caused by this posting. I appreciate your helpful responses.
However, he has a past history of co-worker issues. He has a complaint in his file on unwanted advancements toward his co-worker (female) that has been resolved and closed.
Has anyone ever had to deal with an "unzipper"? Is this behavior normal on any planet?
Disclaimer: I in no way mean to offend anyone with this question. I in no way want any glory or chaos caused by this posting. I appreciate your helpful responses.
Comments
The past history of coworker issues, to use your words, "have been resolved and closed." Leave them that way and deal with the problem posed.
Sit Leisure Suit Larry down and advise him in no uncertain terms that unzipping in transit is unacceptable behavior and you are bringing it to his attention because, gee, Larry, it's possible you weren't even aware you were doing that, were you?
Oops. Just noticed. It appears from your first sentence that you have already documented and disciplined for the in-transit unzipping. If that's the case, follow your disciplinary procedure. When you disciplined him last time, what did you tell him the circumstances would be if it occurred again? Suspension? Termination? Then follow the policy.
In all my life I don't think I have ever "unzipped" on the way to the bathroom even at home.
My guess is that this individual knows what he is doing and does it intentionally as a way of provoking a response, especially if he is doing it in such a way as to be noticeable to others.
I think you are right to address it.
Disclaimer: I completely disassociate myself from the name Leisure Suit Larry.
By the way, good to see you are still with us, Java. I love your questions. As soon as I get over the Leisure Suit Larry thing, hopefully I'll have some constructive input for you.
Crazy indeed. I have to agree w/ Parabeagle-- the earlier sexual harassment issue is closed and should not be referred to in any action you take against this person for his untimely "unzipping".
But, if you've disiciplined him for the same unzipping behavior in the past, you should definitely now escalate the disciplinary action against this person according to your policy and/or any warnings about future occurrences that were included in the earlier disciplinary action.
While you can't take additional action for an earlier harassment incident that has not been repeated, I do think the earlier incident is important information to keep in mind in dealing w/ this individual. Taken together, his repeated unzipping behavior and his tendency toward sexual harassment would indicate to me that this guy is maybe a little bit of a sociopath.... and if your policy (and history of disciplining other EEs in similar circumstances) supports terminating him or putting him on "final warning" status at this point, maybe it's time to do so. By my count, this is "strike three" for this guy, and he sounds like a serious problem looking for a place to happen.
I work in a male-dominant manufacturing facility. If we had this problem with one of our ees I'd feel inclined to have a male manager mention it to him and that would probably end it.
I don't see this much different than a women wearing a blouse that was left unbuttoned too low or had on a skirt too short. I would speak with her about this (document the conversation of course) and if it happened again, she'd get sent home to change into something more business appropriate.
Cheryl C.
I tend to think it is on the side of getting attention as well.
Thank you again!
I am suprised by that comparison. Low cut blouses and mini skirts are acceptable in our society although not necessarily appropriate.
Walking around with your fly unzipped (intentionally) is not socially acceptable behavior (at least yet).
Perhaps both examples are requests for attention but the unzipping seems more of a hostile, "look what I am doing, what are you going to do about it" action.
I suppose you could say a woman who wears revealing clothes is being aggressive in a sense. I never thought of it that way.
For some reason though, the two behaviors still seem very different to me.
Once upon a time we had a female Pruchasing Manager that frequently wore very low cut blouses and tight pants. Her office was next to the plant. Our Plant Foreman (male) actually complained about it because he saw it was a form of sexual harrassment to him and his male employees.
Cheryl C.
Your guy -- I would discipline.
HOW TO POOP AT WORK
We've all been there but don't like to admit it. As much as we try to convince ourselves otherwise, the WORKPOOP is inevitable. For those who hate pooping at work, following is the Survival Guide for taking a dump at work.
CROP DUSTING:
When farting, you walk briskly around the office so the smell is not in your area and everyone else gets a whiff but doesn't know where it came from. Be careful when you do this. Do not stop until the full fart has been expelled. Walk an extra 30 feet to make sure the smell has left your pants.
FLY BY:
This is the act of scouting out a bathroom before pooping. Walk in and check for other poopers. If there are others in the bathroom, leave and come back again. Be careful not to become a FREQUENT FLYER. People may become suspicious if they catch you constantly going into the bathroom.
ESCAPEE:
This is a fart that slips out while taking a leak at the urinal or forcing a poop in a stall. This is usually accompanied by a sudden wave of embarrassment. If you release an escapee do not acknowledge it. Pretend it did not happen. If you are standing next to the farter in the urinal, pretend you did not hear it. No one likes an escapee. It is uncomfortable for all involved. Making a joke or laughing about it makes both parties feel uneasy.
JAILBREAK:
When forcing a poop, several farts slip out at a machine gun pace. This is usually a side effect of diarrhea or a hangover. If this should happen, do not panic. Remain in the stall until everyone has left the bathroom to spare everyone the awkwardness of what just occurred.
COURTESY FLUSH:
The act of flushing the toilet the instant the poop hits the water. This reduces the amount of airtime the poop has to stink up the bathroom. This can help you avoid being caught doing the...
WALK OF SHAME:
Walking from the stall, to the sink, to the door after you have just stunk up the bathroom. This can be a very uncomfortable moment if someone walks in and busts you. As with farts, it is best to pretend the smell doesn't exist. This very uncomfortable walk can be avoided with the use of the COURTESY FLUSH.
OUT OF THE CLOSET POOPER:
This is a colleague who poops at work and is damn proud of it. You will often see an OOTCP enter the bathroom with a newspaper or magazine under his arm. Always look around the office for the OOTCP before entering the bathroom.
THE POOPING FRIENDS NETWORK (PFN):
A group of co-workers who band together to ensure emergency pooping goes off without incident. This group can help you to monitor the whereabouts of OOTCPs and identify SAFE HAVENS.
SAFE HAVEN:
A safe haven is a seldom-used bathroom somewhere in the building where you can least expect visitors. Try floors that are predominately of the opposite sex. This will reduce the odds of a pooper of your sex entering the bathroom.
TURD BURGLAR:
This is someone who does not realize that you are in the stall and tries to force the door open. This is one of the most shocking and vulnerable moments that can occur when taking a poop at work. If this occurs, remain in the stall until the Turd Burglar leaves. This way you will avoid all uncomfortable eye contact.
CAMO-COUGH:
A phony cough that alerts all new entrants into the bathroom that you are in a stall is called a Camo-Cough. This can be used to cover up a WATERMELON or to alert the TURD BURGLARs. The Camo-Cough is very effective when used in conjunction with an ASTAIRE.
ASTAIRE:
An Astaire is a subtle toe-tap that is used to alert potential Turd Burglars that you are occupying a stall. This will end all doubt that the stall is occupied. If you hear an Astaire, leave the bathroom immediately so the pooper can poop in peace.
WATERMELON:
A watermelon is a big poop that creates a loud splash when hitting the toilet water. This is also an embarrassing incident. If you feel a watermelon coming on, create a diversion. See CAMO-COUGH.
HAVANA OMLET:
A case of diarrhea that creates a series of loud splashes in the toilet water. Often accompained by an Escapee. Try using a Camo-Cough with an Astaire.
UNCLE TODD:
An Uncle Todd is a bathroom user who seems to linger around forever. This person could spend extended lengths of time in front of the mirror or sitting on the pot. An Uncle Todd makes it difficult to relax while on the crapper, as you should always wait to poop when the bathroom is empty. This benefits you as well as other bathroom attendees.
But unzippin and whippin out would be a no no.
Balloonman
This was a HOOT!! Thanks for the humor. Your list is remarkably complete...with 1 exception. I would suggest adding:
"SURPRISE POOP: masquerades as a fart...no further definition required. The ultimate cure for those given to CROP DUSTING."