soon to be ex, harassing receptionist

Our company's receptionist is going through a divorce. Up until today, the proceedings have not disrupted the workplace. I came into the lobby this morning and her eyes were puffy from crying and her roomate (who also works here) was trying to comfort her. Evidently, the soon to be ex-husband is calling her here at work, telling her what a bad person she is etc. Then he calls back to apologize. Since we have caller ID, I told her that it was okay not to take his call, even though her job is to answer the phones. I also instructed her that if she feels that she must take his call that she needs to tell him that when the phone call causes disruption in the workplace, that she is to hang up. I gave her a reference for our EAP ,again, shared my concern for her well-being and told her I want to make sure she feels like she is in a safe working environment. I had concerns that there may a threat of violence in the workplace however,there is no evidence of or threat of physical harassment, only verbal. Is there anything else I should do at this point?

Comments

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  • I had something similar happen with an EE. The soon to be ex was calling the EE every 5 minutes and when she refused to take his call, he started calling everyone in the company including my CEO. There was also a threat of violence so we went into "lockdown mode". The police were called and the company made a formal complaint against this individual. Because of the treat against the EE, the police put a warrant out on him and eventually found him. The sad part was when they found him, he had attempted suicide. Since then, the ex has not called the company.

    Good luck.


    LFernandes
  • I would ask her to advise him if he needed to contact her that he needed to do so after work hours as it was disrupting to her job. If this persists, she may want to get her attorney to write him a letter advising him not to contact her at work. You do not need to have a weepy, distracted, frazzled receptionist answering the phones and taking care of customers as they come in the door.

    These things are always very tricky as whatever you do may cause the harasser to escalate into violence. Hopefully, you have good security at your workplace.
  • Since there is not threat of violence yet, it may be premature to call the police. But, if it continues, and is disruptive, I would file a harassment complaint with the local police. They could have a "friendly" chat with this guy warning him of what may happen if he goes further and crosses the line. Maybe, before it gets to that point, have his calls diverted to the HR manager who could warn him he is not to call or he will be turned in to the police for harassment. I once had to warn an ex-spouse to stop all contact at work or we would report the incidents based on the grounds that he was harassing the employee at work and disrupting the business.
  • Faced with similar situations in the past, I have alerted the local police to the situation so they, at least, have a file in place. I then ask the employee for a picture of the harasser and make sure employees located at entrances know what this person looks like. Then line up "volunteer helpers" (employees) that the receptionist can call for assistance in case a situation gets ugly before the police arrive. The helpers' sole mission is to keep the intruder isolated (nonviolently if at all possible) away from other employees and hallways or doorways leading to other parts of the building. At first read, this might sound rather cavalier and reckless because of the potential danger to the helpers. But the most dangerous time is the time before the police arrive. We've all read about what can happen and you want to prepare a self defense in case the worst happens.
  • Wow Larry you are right on the money. As the only male in the HR department in a past life, guess who was the designated helper x:D There is also a liability issue as you know there is a potential threat, so you must be prepared to respond. If you can have a frank discussion with this employee you may also look at where can she be moved to in the event her ex flips one day so that when he shows up he cannot find her. One big issue with an ex who becomes violent sometimes the only place they know where to find the indivual is at work, thus increasing the chance that violence, though not work related, could spill over into the workplace. Receptionist is really tricky but for other employees just physically changing their location and alerting a number of helpers to the issue and a picture of the individual can go a long way.
    My $0.02 worth.
    DJ The Balloonman
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