Funniest/Weirdest Thing You Have Seen on a Resume

While probably not the funniest or weirdest thing I have seen on a resume over the years, I did just see this on a resume that crossed my desk today:

"Received 9 peer pin awards, a starfish award, and daily praise from happy end users."

So this begs me to ask all of you this question.  What is the funniest or weirdest thing you have seen on a resume lately? 

 

Comments

  • 25 Comments sorted by Votes Date Added
  • How about some one coming in for a graphic artist position and when asked for his portfolio, he whips out his pencil and says "It's all in here, what would you like to see?" Hows that for chutzpah!
  • I once had an interviewee hug me at the end of the interview. Funny thing was that the interview was far from warm and fuzzy (not that a hug would have been appropriate in any circumstance)!!
  • I had an applicant come in wearing a jogging suit (i.e. sweats) and sneakers.  She gave one and two word answers to all my questions. At the end of the interview, she said "I don't want this job anyway."
  • Mine is an interview experience as well. A number of years ago I called an applicant to set up an interview and the music on her answering machine was bizarre--I almost didn't leave a message. When she came in for the interview, her eyes were red, she spoke very slowly, and smelled of Marijuana. During the very short interview, the HR Assistant called to say someone was in the reception area and needed to speak with the candidate. She left the interview to meet with this person in the elevator lobby. We can't be sure, but thought it was a drug sale. At any rate, we didn't continue the interview.

  • I recently received a resume from a candidate that referred to himself throughout the resume and coverletter as Mr.(last name).  Who does that?

  • Hey, I received a resume from a graduate engineer that was obviously produced by some kind of consultant or resume service.

    It was on stiff marbelized paper, was oversized, and was folded in half. The printing was embossed in royal blue.  It looked like a menu from a five-star restaurant! 

     Just give me the facts and forget this fancy stuff. 

  • Reading these posts and from what I see come into our department, I think applicants are getting a lot of bad advice from the Internet, "how to" books, and headhunters.
  • One of the weirdest I have seen lately was a resume completely written in 3rd party.  "Mr. Smith worked at ABC Company for 3 years and was a hard-worker in the Production Department.  He is intelligent and can handle complicated procedures with ease."

    Another one was the resume that I received with WAY to much information.  Included his wife's name, his kids' names, ages and schools that the kids attended.  I could have easily tracked down his kids!

    Oh, and then there was the resume I received from "God".  I'm not kidding.  It was the cover sheet attached to the applying resume.

  • I have also received quite a few resumes latey written in the 3rd person.  Is this something new that the "experts" are telling candidates to do?

  • Last summer I was hiring and I had a stack of applications to weed through.  On one particular ap...the candidate stated that he worked at Subway...he stated his job there was "Sandwich Artist"  It amused me so much I had to call the guy in for an interview![:D]
  • [quote user="IT HR"]

    I have also received quite a few resumes latey written in the 3rd person.  Is this something new that the "experts" are telling candidates to do?

    [/quote]

    If it is, then the "experts" ought to be smacked.  I can tell you that it went into my "No" pile really quick. It iritates me to no end for someone to tell me what I should think and that is what it reminds me of!

  • I've kept a few typos running around in my head.

    I received a form cover letter, complete with underlining for where the key word was to be typed in.  Dear Employer, I am submitting my resume in application for the secretart position advertised in the xyz paper.

    I reviewed a resume in which a person claimed to have worked as a conslutant for 5 years.

  • I saw a resume where the contact email address was "darklord."
  • I just saw a resume with the email address - name@iworkinmyunderwear.com

     

     

     

  • A quote from a resume, "I graduated from college with honors: Cum Lande".  Obviously, this is the new Latin!  [:)]

    Ken

  • Im a HR Manager for the Gov. and I had an applicant to come in my office with a reference ( a real live person).  I ask why didn't she just get a letter of recommendation. His reply was I don't put my name or signature on nothing for the government or the applicant.  Needless to say because I could I had him search and found a pistol on him in a federal building and he had warrants.  She gave me a follow up call to ask did she get the job and is there anything she need to change in the interveiw process.  My reply was "not a thing".
  • While working for a very tightly controlled company, I was interviewing groups of people prior to giving them proficiency tests.  Part of the application process was my orientation speech about the company, the background checks we did, what the tests would be and our policy on smoking, violence in the workplace, and harassment.  One applicant asked if our no tolerance policy on violence meant he couldn't fight it out with coworkers when they bothered him.  I said, "Yes, no physical fighting and no verbal fighting is allowed." (DUH!)  His response was, "Thank you, ma'am, I'll be leaving.  I ain't working no place where I can't fight for my opinion."  (Thank you,,,the door is this way...)
  • One of my first jobs was at Subway, and that is what Subway refers to their employees as: "Sandwich Artists"!  [:D]
  • I work as a recruiter / headhunter. The company I work for does placements for executive level positions all the way down to light industrial, minimum wage temp jobs. Needless to say, we've seen quite a few colorful characters.

     - "Illumination Engineer" - he went around the warehouse changing light bulbs and florescent lights.

    - [Person applying for a high level CNC machine operator position] Vast knowledge of vacuum, microwave, electronic, and lawn mower equipment.

    - I had one kid say he graduated from "collage". There are so many college students who don't even bother to proof read their resumes. I don't even bother to read past the first two. I assume one might be a typo but two is just pushing it. Grammar and spelling have been made so simplified thanks to computers.

    - One woman went into great detail about how she's the perfect person for an office's customer service position. She had experience with working at a Deny's diner-styled restaurant. She mentioned how she had to perform advanced mathematical calculations and escort people to the bathroom.

    - We had one lady tell us she couldn't make it to work because her WALRUS was SICK and needed to stay in the BATHTUB for the day.

    WE HAVE A WINNER!

  • I recieved a resume for a admin position with the email address- BigJuggs36dd@xxxxx.com
  • Someone else wrote the resume for him
  • I have a couple favorites.  <?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" />

    One was a resume from a DJ for an entry level engineering position.  One of their listed accomplishments was "Provided a funky fresh flow nightly"

    Our company deals with industrial and medical gases - like oxygen.  We had a flight attendant who I guess read in our description "air" and applied to us.  We don't actually fly airplanes.

     

  • An applicant was applying for a Front Desk Customer Service position and listed on her cover letter, her e-mail address as the best means of contacting her.  The e-mail address was YourWorstNightmare@(web address).com.  As this job was replacing a nightmare, I did not contact this applicant!
  • A couple of the funny ones I ran into were:

    A resume that listed several pertinent items under the heading, "QUALIFICTIONS". (Honest!)

    A cover letter stating that the (female) applicant needed to leave work early occasionally to pursue her other job of organizing "sex-toy parties" and recruiting potential hostesses. Just what we needed, someone to hit up all our employees for that!

  • Years ago I sat in an interview with a buddy of mine who was hiring a sales person for his carpet company.  When he asked him to tell him why felt he should offer him the job, his reply was "Look at this baby face.  Wouldn't you buy just about anything from me?  Mother Love me and Father Trust me.  Sign here please."  He leaned in and did the "teapot" close with a pen in his hand.

     Notice all of that was in quotes!  We had to hold in our laughter but he was not offered the job due to other reasons but we still call each other and say "Mothers love me and fathers trust me"

     

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