THEY ARE EVERYWHERE!!
HS
923 Posts
*I couldn't stop laughing when someone sent me this email...hope it brings a smile to all of you!*
IDIOTS AT WORK...
I was signing the receipt for my credit card purchase when the clerk noticed that I had never signed my name on the back of the credit card. She informed me that she could not complete the transaction unless the card was signed. When I asked why, she explained that it was necessary to compare the signature on the credit card with the signature I just signed on the receipt. So I signed the credit card in front of her. She carefully compared that signature to the one I signed on the receipt. As luck would have it, they matched.
ADVICE FOR IDIOTS
An actual tip from page 16 of the HP "Environmental, Health & Safety Handbook for Employees: "Blink your eyelids periodically to lubricate your eyes."
IDIOTS IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD
I live in a semi-rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the removal of the Deer Crossing sign on our road. The reason: Many deer were being hit by cars and he no longer wanted them to cross there.
IDIOTS IN FOOD SERVICE
My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked the individual behind the counter for "minimal lettuce." He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg.
IDIOT SIGHTINGS
Sighting #1:
I was at the airport, checking in at the gate, when the airport employee asked, "Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?" I said, "If it was without my knowledge, how
would I know?" He smiled and nodded knowingly, "That's why we ask."
Sighting #2:
The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it is safe to cross the street. I was crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker of mine, when she asked if I knew what the buzzer was
for. I explained that it signals to blind people when the light is red. She responded, appalled, "What on earth are blind people doing driving?"
Sighting #3:
At a good-bye lunch for an old and dear coworker who is leaving the company due to "downsizing," our manager spoke up and said, "This is fun. We should have lunch like this more often." Not another word was spoken. We just looked at each other like deer staring into the headlights of an approaching truck.
Sighting #4:
I worked with an Individual who plugged her power strip back into itself and for the life of her could not understand why her system would not turn on.
Sighting #5:
When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told that the keys had been accidentally locked in it. We went to the service department and found a
mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver's side door. As I watched from the passenger's side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered it was open. "Hey," I announced to
the technician, "It's open!" "I know," answered the young man. "I already got that side."
IDIOTS AT WORK...
I was signing the receipt for my credit card purchase when the clerk noticed that I had never signed my name on the back of the credit card. She informed me that she could not complete the transaction unless the card was signed. When I asked why, she explained that it was necessary to compare the signature on the credit card with the signature I just signed on the receipt. So I signed the credit card in front of her. She carefully compared that signature to the one I signed on the receipt. As luck would have it, they matched.
ADVICE FOR IDIOTS
An actual tip from page 16 of the HP "Environmental, Health & Safety Handbook for Employees: "Blink your eyelids periodically to lubricate your eyes."
IDIOTS IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD
I live in a semi-rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the removal of the Deer Crossing sign on our road. The reason: Many deer were being hit by cars and he no longer wanted them to cross there.
IDIOTS IN FOOD SERVICE
My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked the individual behind the counter for "minimal lettuce." He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg.
IDIOT SIGHTINGS
Sighting #1:
I was at the airport, checking in at the gate, when the airport employee asked, "Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?" I said, "If it was without my knowledge, how
would I know?" He smiled and nodded knowingly, "That's why we ask."
Sighting #2:
The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it is safe to cross the street. I was crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker of mine, when she asked if I knew what the buzzer was
for. I explained that it signals to blind people when the light is red. She responded, appalled, "What on earth are blind people doing driving?"
Sighting #3:
At a good-bye lunch for an old and dear coworker who is leaving the company due to "downsizing," our manager spoke up and said, "This is fun. We should have lunch like this more often." Not another word was spoken. We just looked at each other like deer staring into the headlights of an approaching truck.
Sighting #4:
I worked with an Individual who plugged her power strip back into itself and for the life of her could not understand why her system would not turn on.
Sighting #5:
When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told that the keys had been accidentally locked in it. We went to the service department and found a
mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver's side door. As I watched from the passenger's side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered it was open. "Hey," I announced to
the technician, "It's open!" "I know," answered the young man. "I already got that side."
Comments
Amanda
x:D
Thanks - I really needed the laughs. All of those people have either been in my office or called me today.
That's our tax dollars hard at work!
I worked with a girl (yes she was blond) who had the job of customer service. After getting off the phone with a customer, she asked, as serious as can be, "are Spain and Japan the same place?"
Same girl, another time, was sharing an office with another girl. The second girl was having trouble with her ears popping (wound up getting tubes). She was complaining about it one day and this girl asked her, serious again, "if I get close enough, can I hear them pop?"
This same girl was taking night courses at the local community college. She came into work one day, all excited because she had taken a typing test the night before and did really well. We asked how she did and she said she typed 30 wpm with only 2 errors.
I loved working with this girl - she kept us on our toes!
Yes, she bought 3 new vaccuum cleaners in a year because she didn't know they came with bags that needed to be changed! Where exactly did she think all of that dirt was going?? xflash (Yes, I'm sorry to say, she was blond too!)